Written by Guest Contributor, Ryan McLaury | January 25, 2024
In over fifteen years of marriage, my wife, Natalie, and I have been on quite the generosity journey. As newlyweds at the young age of twenty-two, we clung to what money we had early on. Sure, we tithed to our church, but I don’t think either of us could honestly say we had the healthiest relationship with money or financial generosity. But – as busy as we thought we were in those early years – we had time to give. So, even as we welcomed our first child five years into marriage, we were able to be generous with our time. While, in hindsight, I could have been more selfless with my excess of time, I have many fond memories of serving various nonprofits with our church community group and other organizations.
Now, as proud (exhausted) parents of four kids aged 9, 7, 7, and 5, time is a limited resource, which tends to get prioritized toward our kids’ various activities. I remember a discussion with our community group a few years back when I shared my struggle with guilt over our group’s decline in serving as our families grew. We were certainly in the trenches of childrearing, but were we using our kids as an excuse for not being more generous with our time? But then it hit me: perhaps the best use of my time is pouring into these four kids. After all, being brave (crazy?) enough to have four kids means they have the potential to have double the impact on the world than the two of us parents can. For a numbers guy like me, that math made a lot of sense.
As a result, we’ve committed to pouring as much of our time into our kids’ development as possible. It’s tiring, and we’re far from perfect parents, but by the grace of God – and with the help of the generosity planning process through Dynamis – one area of success has been intentionally including our kids in generosity planning and execution. Whenever we give money or time to a cause, we want them to be aware and have a voice in it. We’re holding family meetings and talking at the dinner table, explaining where (and why) we’re serving and asking for their input on how else we can be generous. Leading by example and talking through generosity also gives meaning to the generous activities the kids are already engaged in – serving our neighbors, quarterly service projects for school, fundraisers, etc. They’re still young and don’t yet fully grasp how it all works, but each conversation or action brings them closer to the goal of loving and serving others as Christ has loved and served us. Really, can’t we all say we’re still figuring out how to be generous the way God has called us? It’s a process – one that I’m thankful we get to work through as a family.
Maybe you weren’t crazy enough to have four kids, or you don’t have kids, or your kids are grown, but we all have the opportunity to share generosity with others. And as I’ve experienced, you might just learn from those with whom you’re sharing. I encourage you to complete a Generosity Plan with Dynamis as a next step if you haven’t already. If you have, then encourage others to do the same and prayerfully consider ways you can share your generosity with those God has placed in your life.
Bio:
Ryan McLaury is a husband, father of 4, and native of St. Louis. Passionate about fostering community and loving his neighbors, he is active at Reliant Church in St. Louis City and serves on the boards of local non-profits, Lutheran Development Group and Humanitri. He is a self-employed real estate investor and founder of Rhythm Development. Ryan enjoys coaching youth soccer, playing pickleball and volleyball (really any sport), traveling, and exploring the outdoors with his wonderful family.
